Pascal

(Paul, this isn't the post I said I'd write, it's something different)

On Tuesday after my presentation that I'd been stressing over for several days, Mike and I went to an animal shelter to visit a kitty I'd read about on Craigslist. His name is Pascal. For weeks I'd seen ads for him in the pets section. He was cute and I wondered why no one had adopted him yet. The ads said he was showing signs of stress from being in a cage for so long (about two months). I was sad for Pascal. He seemed so cute, and the videos of him online made him seem really chill and friendly.

We'd planned to go on Sunday, but we weren't sure if the shelter was open (Easter), and we didn't plan well enough to leave in time to get there before it closed anyway. So, instead, we went on Tuesday. Mike and I promised each other we wouldn't adopt a cat on Tuesday. We would go visit, then come home and think about it, and then return to adopt later if that's what we wanted.

Pascal was a big cat, compared to our two smaller females. He wasn't aggressive or even that playful, but surprisingly calm, and almost sad. He seemed to enjoy some attention, but definitely had an independent streak to him. He was so pretty, and I just wanted to pet and hold him until he purred and squinted his eyes all happy-like the way cats do. He seemed sweet, but mostly depressed at his shelter life. I knew our apartment would be a better home, despite the possibility of kitty drama. While we were there, I thought about asking if we could put money down for him, to reserve him, but come back in a day or so to get him after we had arranged the apartment. But we'd agreed not to make decisions yet, so I didn't mention it.

I kept checking the website after we visited, making sure he was still there, but he'd been there so long, I wasn't really worried. Mike and I talked about getting him this weekend sometime, perhaps, or maybe next Monday or Tuesday, depending on how quickly we could set up the apartment how we wanted it so that the cats could live in separate parts at first. I thought about Pascal a lot since Tuesday. I thought about how happy he would be when he got out of the shelter, even if we weren't there all day with him at first. I thought about how I'd do my best not to be too friendly with him, and how I'd let him warm up to me, and just talk to him at first instead of trying to pet him so much. I thought about how neat it would be to have a male cat, especially a big pretty orange cat like him. I thought about how he'd probably flop on the couch with me when I watched television or was reading. I thought about a lot of things, but they were mostly centered around how happy Pascal would be here, and how much love he would get from us.

This afternoon I checked the site again. Pascal was adopted today, by someone else.

I'm happy he's not at the shelter anymore. I know it's good for him. I just wanted to be one of the people to love him. I don't want to sound selfish. I just got a little attached a bit too soon, I guess. *sniff*